Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
About Deviant Premium Member wolfforce or Morningdew24/Female/United States Group :icondream-makers: Dream-Makers
 
Recent Activity
Deviant for 9 Years
14 Month Premium Membership:
Given by Lyrak
Statistics 892 Deviations 27,552 Comments 51,537 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

Webcam

To-Do List (in order of priority)

*New DA ID
*Warriors Fan-Fic Comic
*100 Themes Challenge: wolfforce58.deviantart.com/jou…

Owed List

Things I Owe Others:
-I owe nothing-


Things Others Owe Me:
:iconsharpe19: -Morningdew & Awd Badges (finished, needs to upload/send)
:iconadarkernemisis: -Wolf & Kit Fox (paid, sending when able to) [sent address 4/5]
:iconmuddy-coyote: -Coyote Mount (2/18: form worked on, waiting to settle more before rehydrating pelt)
:iconzhon: -Gray Fox Mount (3/4: message received; been busy!)
:iconcreatureundertaker: -Marble Fox Mount (1/9: waiting for foxes from supplier, then I'll need to choose a new one to start over with)
FurBuy Person-Awd Fursuit Head (4/7: package got sent back, sending back when able to)
Facebook Person-Head & Tail for Fundraisers (4/1: working on detailing, needs to sew on neck pieces, waiting for new nose to come in the mail, pic sent)
Etsy Person-Footpaws (shoes received)

Do you have to look at your character's ref sheet to get their markings correct? 

50%
7 deviants said For some I do, yes.
21%
3 deviants said Yes, I do.
14%
2 deviants said Only if I want to get the markings super specific, because they're markings that could be specific or generalized (eg. spots)
7%
1 deviant said I don't draw. Ever. Or I don't have ANY characters. This question doesn't apply to me.
7%
1 deviant said I have to for most of my characters.
0%
No deviants said I don't, no.
0%
No deviants said Other

People I Know IRL

:heart::iconblackfirehawk: (Kadota or Kota):heart:
:iconlast-chance-child: (The Holy Pulp or Clone)
:iconneelloc91: (Dr. Neelloc or Midget)
:iconboymeetsfish: (ex-roommate)
:iconkakashi663: (Tad)
:iconmiakalin: (Miaka)
:iconbrink-of-death: (Steph)
:iconvampiresdisaster: (Jenna)
:iconmidnight172: (Luna)
:iconthisnuisance: (Nui)
:iconzifog: (GB)
:icongreendayperson: (Brittany)

Who Made My Bits:

The New Dew by wolfforce58

Morningdew Fursuit (head, clawed paws, indoor and outdoor feet, body): Sharpe19

Curled Tail: (I don't know...bought it at BLFC 2014 >.< )

Short-Haired Armsleeves: Megan Rathbun ( www.youtube.com/channel/UCrBKH… )

Poi Fursuit Gloves: TentacleLoveGoddess

Claw-less Higher Wrist Fursuit Gloves: www.facebook.com/pages/EZ-Crea…

Glowing Camo Collar: www.furaffinity.net/user/Lavaf…

Bone Prop: (I don't remember...someone on Facebook...^^;)

Skunk Fursuit Head: Sarah-cat

Black Canine Fursuit Head (E'ah): www.furaffinity.net/user/nienn…

Black Handpaws: www.furaffinity.net/user/sewin…

Tail Harness: furtastictails.com/

Light Blue Full Body Harness: www.etsy.com/shop/CollaredCorg…

Fursuit Sandals: ME! =D

Life Goals

*Pet A Wolf
*Get A Pomeranian/Pom-Mix
*Go to Further Confusion
*Have A Full Fursuit of Morningdew
*Have A Quadruped Fursuit w/ Arm Stilts
*Get A Career in Animal Control
*Have A House
*Get Married (Wedding Funds Saved: $2,232/$5,000)
*Have Property
*Grow/Raise Most of My Own Food
*ONLY Buy Local Food or Self-Grown Food

Vent...Feel Free to Ignore

Journal Entry: Sat Apr 18, 2015, 6:18 PM


Life Updates:
Feel free to ignore this. I just need a way to vent, and talking to real people just doesn't feel like an appealing option to me right now.

My mantra today has been, "I wish I was dead" (or alternatively, "I wish I was never born"...either one). I just hate the fact that I exist. If I didn't have an amazing fiance and a dog, I would probably consider suicide. It's just that bad right now. Which is really stupid, because I really do find the world to be an amazing place and an experience that's worth living for. But lately I just hate the fact that I exist. I hate myself. I wish I wasn't here.

I got at trouble at work for saying something stupid on the phone. I sometimes just say things I don't even mean without thinking about what I'm ACTUALLY saying. I didn't know the answer to a question, and everyone was gone, but I didn't want to go look for them and abandon the front counter, so I tried to wing it. It especially didn't help that the only other person working at the time is the person who I am pretty sure really hates me. She's always really short with me, and whenever I ask her questions she either ignores them (like seriously just DOES NOT reply), or gives vague or half-answers (or "I'unno"s). So yeah, I tried to wing it. Wrong move. I fucked up. So I got in trouble for it, and sternly corrected. I was also told that the others said I've been bossy. I'm trying to think of what the fuck I'm doing wrong. I've decided I should just avoid talking to my coworkers unless necessary. I don't see myself as a bossy person. But obviously I must be. That or I'm just a jackass, who knows. So I've insulted them and let them down. I feel like a real dumbass, and hate myself for it. SO. MUCH. It didn't help that I started today in a bad mood, and have been feeling down for a while now. Then I go and fuck up, and find out I've been fucking up for a while. Looks like all I can ever be is a fuck up...all my life...can't do shit right.

So now I'm just convinced everyone at work loathes me and wishes I was gone. My supervisor assured me it was okay as long as I work on it (and ASK FOR HELP the next time I need it), but I don't forgive myself. I have always been a worthless piece of shit, and I feel like that's all I'll ever amount to. I feel like I'm going to get fired and just further disappoint everyone in my life. I genuinely wish I was never born. I never do shit right. And what's the point of living if all I do is make life harder for others? What's the fucking point if all I do is upset people?! If that's all I'm good for is upsetting others, then I really want to just die already and get out of everyone's way. There's really no point to life for me if I'm a hindrance or annoyance to others. I like HELPING, not HURTING.

So yeah, sorry to play the "WOE IS ME!" game over stupid shit. I just really need to vent somewhere...and I don't feel like venting to my roommate or fiance. I don't want to make them feel sorry for me or try to console me or anything. I don't need or even deserve pity. The bottom line is I'm a terrible human  being. I really truly hate myself. Lately I have a hard time trying to remember why I bother staying alive. I don't know whether I should say it's a good thing I have an amazing fiance, or if it's a terrible thing. Just another life I'm ruining....

-------------------------------------------------------------------
Find Me On:
:iconwolfforce58205:-My Fur Account
Youtube: www.youtube.com/user/wolfforce…
GaiaOnline: www.gaiaonline.com/profiles/?u…
Photobucket: smg.photobucket.com/albums/v46…
Weasyl: www.weasyl.com/profile/wolffor…

photo


Designed by KovoWolf & coded by sergbel

deviantID

wolfforce58
wolfforce or Morningdew
United States
I'm a furry, I'm a canine "artist" and definitely an internet addict. I live in northern California and love that I do. Not much exciting about me...

╔═╦╗╔╦═╦═╦╗╔╗ Put This On
║═╣║║║╔╣╔╣╚╝║Your deviant ID If
║╔╣╚╝║║║║╚╗╔╝You Are Or
╚╝╚══╩╝╚╝♥╚╝Support Furries

Current Residence: Northern California
Personal Quote: "You are the moon and I am the stars. So no matter where you go I will always be near."

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconjamjams:
JamJams Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Are you coming to BLFC again this year?
Reply
:iconwolfforce58:
wolfforce58 Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2015
Yup! Already requested the time off work and reserved the hotel room and everything! I'm guessing you will be back again this year?
Reply
:iconjamjams:
JamJams Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Yep! Hopefully we'll get a chance to see you and get to say hi. ^^
Reply
:iconwolfforce58:
wolfforce58 Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2015
Hopefully! =D
Reply
:iconlamelobo:
lamelobo Featured By Owner Mar 10, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
thank you dear!!! :)
Reply
:iconlamelobo:
lamelobo Featured By Owner Mar 10, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
:tighthug: :) thank you !!!
Reply
:iconcarbon-vanilla:
Carbon-Vanilla Featured By Owner Mar 9, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Whooo! Llama!!
182 : Dance Together Emoticon 
Reply
:iconsuwaneeechoes:
SuwaneeEchoes Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2015  New member Student General Artist
Hey thanks for the watch!:)
Reply
:iconfrontierfurs:
FrontierFurs Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2015
Hey, I got my art you sent, thanks so much!! Turned out awesome :D
Reply
:iconwolfforce58:
wolfforce58 Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2015
^_^ Glad to hear it arrived safely!
Reply
Add a Comment: